Little Fire

Raining today, buts it is actually not depressing. Usually on rainy days I'll sit and reflect for hours, and if I'm listening to Patti Griffin forget it. You'll just find me with a box of tissues thinking about the sadness in life and missing my mother.

Today, a different day, we had a family date in --literally--the bowels of Rhode Island to visit my dear friend Amber, her hubby and little daughter Jillian (aka JillyBean).

I feel as though this "staying in RI" thing could work out. Its hard still, yes, but I keep feeling little glimmers of hope, or flashes of light in a dim, sometimes lonely cave. I feel, on a deeper, spiritual level that maybe God would want us here... maybe we have a purpose that exceeds our struggles and disappointments.

We splurged the other day and bought the new Patti Griffin CD-- not as somber as her last CDs--its called Downtown Church (great collection of songs. Highly recommend it). So its been on repeat for the last few weeks in our car... listening to old spirituals as well as some new ones that she wrote. Little Fire has been stuck in my head.. here's a little peak at it. I love it because it makes me feel, and know that we're safe in God's shelter and warmth... and that he's making a path for us to walk in...

My friend come and stand beside me

lately, I'm feeling so lost

A flood came and washed the stones from the path away

and a hot sun turned the mud to dust

All that I want is one who knows me

A kind hand on my face when I weep

And I'd give back these things I know are meaningless

for a little fire beside me when I sleep

so the journey continues... and we're thoroughly enjoying our life. Daughter so beautiful, a husband who I cherish, a marriage that ignites me, a spirituality that feeds, changes, inspires, challenges me, a God that holds me... so much to be thankful for